When Nothing Goes According to Plan
When Nothing Goes According to Plan
There's a certain kind of frustration that comes when nothing goes the way you intended it to. I help clients through this all the time.....and then last week it was my turn. All of my plans changed at once and I was NOT happy.
It always works out
Last week, I had a two-day workshop postponed at the very last minute. At the same time, what I thought was a routine dermatologist visit turned into a procedure to remove stage zero melanoma from my leg.
Suddenly, the calendar I thought I had control over wasn’t mine anymore.
Plans disappeared, new appointments appeared, and now even simple things like going in the ocean are off the table for the next 6–8 weeks while I heal. It created that familiar feeling of losing control, the one that shows up when life doesn’t ask for your permission before changing things.
And if you’re anything like me, your mind has A LOT to say about that.
Frustration. Disappointment. Maybe even a little “why now, why me?” energy. Not because you’re ungrateful, but because you’re human.
Here’s what I’m learning (again): we rarely have as much control as we think we do. Unexpected things happen all the time and sometimes they happen all at once. Actually, I feel like they usually happen all at once.
But when I step back and take a breath, I can see the bigger picture. Yes, I was disappointed about the workshop. However, it also gave me space to heal without the pressure of travel or performance. Which worked out in the end.
Yes, no one wants unexpected medical news. And my first reaction is often annoyance (which isn't the best reaction but is kind of funny to me). But right behind it is perspective and gratitude. Gratitude for access to care, for catching it early, and for the ability to do something about it.
That perspective doesn’t erase the feelings, but it helps me move forward. This isn’t about pushing emotions down or pretending everything is fine. It’s about letting them move through, noticing them, and then choosing what comes next.
Because even when we’re not in control of what happens, we are still in control of how we respond. We get to choose where our mind goes. We get to choose what stays on our plate and what gets dropped. We get to choose how we spend unexpected time.
And this week? I chose rest.
The productive part of me kept whispering that I “should” be doing more, starting something new, making use of this time. But the more honest part of me was just plain tired.
So maybe, just maybe, this pause wasn't random. Maybe it’s a reminder that my health matters more than my calendar. And that slowing down isn’t falling behind. Because sometimes the lesson keeps showing up until we actually listen.
So I listened. Instead of spending all my energy being pissed and fighting what was, I accepted it and decided what to do next. Or as the Socrates quote goes: "The secret of change is to focus all of your energy not on fighting the old, but on building the new." (I guess this applies to unexpected change too!)
I leaned into this week exactly as it was and trusted that it would all work out.
Not by chance either, but by the choices I made each day. Which included getting back to my meditation practice of 10 minutes a day and eating healthy. (Yes, I have to keep coming back to those habits because they are the first ones to slide when I get busy.)
What about you? What isn’t going according to plan for you right now? What is giving you the "I'm losing control" vibes? What is really stressing you out?
Whatever it is, it's going to be ok. Not because everything magically fixes itself, but because you get to decide how you move through it.
You are smart, you are capable, and you know what you REALLY need. You just need to step back, take a breath, and get quiet long enough to hear it and honor it.
If you want support in making those choices… that’s exactly the work I do. Because you deserve to enjoy this life you are working so hard for! And you are the only one that can make that happen. But you don't have to do it alone - I'm here to help.
Take a breath. Accept what is. Choose what's next. Reach out for support.
Cheers to accepting the unexpected,
Sharon
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