The Strategy That Keeps You In The Game
What if it's not about winning?
Our middle school soccer games started this week. The boys’ team is solid, they know how to play. Winning is on the table for them. The girls’ team? Different story.
There are only two girls who really know how to play soccer. Because our school is so small, just fielding a team is hard. Last year every game ended by halftime due to mercy rules. So for the first game this season, the coaches made a choice that might sound strange if you’re only thinking about winning.
Using What You Have
They put the two strongest players on defense instead of offense.
They knew they weren’t going to win by scoring goals. The strategy wasn’t to win. It was to lose by less.
And it worked.
They still lost the game. But they made it through the entire match without being mercy-ruled. They held off goals. They stayed in it. They protected what they could.
No one watching would call that a failure. It was smart. It was realistic. And it was all they could do with the resources (players) they had.
It got me thinking about how often we apply the wrong strategy to the situation we’re actually in. It’s early February and for many of us, our energy is still low. Starved of sunlight and trapped in ice, cold, and darkness, it's hard to have forward momentum.
It is a time where motivation is inconsistent. The “fresh start” buzz of January has worn off, but spring momentum hasn’t arrived yet. And yet, this is often when we tell ourselves we should set bolder goals, push harder, add more, and reinvent everything.
But what if this season isn’t about offense? What if it’s about defense?
Instead of asking "How do I win right now?”, maybe the better question is “How do I lose less?”
That might look like:
Protecting your health instead of optimizing it
Investing in the relationships at work that already function instead finding new contacts
Keeping the parts of your schedule that are working instead of overhauling everything
Nourishing yourself with an existing practice rather than chasing a new routine
Saving your sanity instead of trying to save the world
Re-reading a book that brings comfort and joy (hey, it's still reading!)
Eating semi-healthy foods that you enjoy instead of forcing in kale (I mean, does anyone like kale? Is it torture for everyone?)
Some people might read this and think, “That sounds like setting the bar too low.” But is it really? Because when you’re constantly playing offense from a deficit, everything costs more energy than it should.
In my personal and professional experience, doing what you can with what you have is a solid start.
When you start by protecting what’s already strong, you build stability. When you reduce losses, you preserve stamina. And when you’re not constantly recovering from depletion, momentum becomes possible again.
Someone else might be ahead of you right now.
But if you can lose less this month - emotionally, physically, relationally - there’s a very real chance you surpass them later when your energy returns and your footing is solid.
That’s not settling. That's not being lazy. That’s strategy.
A strategy that lets you build your strength, momentum, and skill over time, just like our girls' soccer team. (And kudos to our girls! They know how slim the odds are and they keep showing up, putting in the work, and doing the best they can.)
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Cheers to losing less,
Sharon
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