Stop Overthinking. Start Rising.
How Women Rise - Habits 11 & 12
Letting Go So We Can Step Into 2026 with Energy + Promise
As we wrap up this year and this How Women Rise newsletter series, it feels fitting that our final two habits are the ones that quietly drain our energy the most: Habit 11: Ruminating and Habit 12: Letting Your Radar Distract You.
Both are mental habits that masquerade as “being prepared” or “being thoughtful,” but in reality, they pull us out of the moment, rob our confidence, and leave us exhausted before the day even begins. And because we’re closing out the year together, this is the perfect time to notice what we want to leave behind so we can walk into 2026 with clarity, steadiness, and renewed momentum.
Over-Think Much?
Habit 11: Ruminating
Women are especially prone to replaying conversations, decisions, or possibilities long after they’ve passed. As How Women Rise explains, we tend to interpret events through a more relational lens: What did they mean by that? Did I say the wrong thing? Should I have done something differently?
(Or like what happened to me this week: was a hug appropriate, or should it have been a handshake? And I did both, so is that even more weird? And then I made a laugh that made a weird noise. So they either think I did a great job or I'm a total weirdo. Either way, I'll be memorable.)
Feel familiar? This tendency isn’t a flaw, it’s a form of care. But when it becomes a loop, it stops being useful and starts becoming paralyzing.
In the book, Sally Helgesen shares examples of high-performing women who spend hours reliving a tiny piece of feedback or imagining worst-case scenarios before a big conversation. The common thread? The mind won’t rest until it feels it has solved something… even if there’s nothing to solve.
But you can interrupt the spiral.
Here are simple, powerful, pattern-breaking prompts to bring you back to your center. When you catch yourself ruminating, ask:
What is it about this situation that won’t let my mind rest?
Is there something I actually need to do?
Do I need to set aside time later to address this?
Or is this simply my imagination running away with worst-case scenarios?
Take three slow, deep breaths. In through the nose. Out through the mouth. Do this multiple times throughout your day. And then evaluate your answer and decide what, if anything, needs to be done. (Hint: usually the only thing to be done is to focus on something else).
It’s incredible how quickly the nervous system recalibrates when we pause long enough to let it. Ruminating loses its grip when we return to the present and give ourselves permission to stop solving problems that don’t actually exist.
Habit 12: Letting Your Radar Distract You
One of our biggest strengths - especially as women - is our ability to sense what’s happening around us. We read the room, anticipate needs, detect shifts in tone, and pick up on the smallest details.
This “radar” has helped many of us succeed. But as the book points out, the challenge is when our radar becomes overactive. When we are so attuned to everything that’s happening around us, we lose sight of what needs to happen within us.
Examples from the book include women who notice every side conversation, every eyebrow raise, every sigh… and assume they must respond to all of them. This leads to overextension, overwhelm, and the feeling of being perpetually “on.”
A simple centering question: What do I need to do right now?
Not: What does everyone else need? What might go wrong? What could I anticipate or prevent?
Just: What is mine to do in this moment?
This question brings your radar back into alignment. It takes your focus from the external to the internal. And it helps you choose your next step instead of reacting to everyone else’s.
Don't forget to pair it with a few deep breaths throughout the day. Your attention is a precious resource. Reclaiming it will help you improve all aspects of your life and career.
As We Close the Series + Close the Year
We've been exploring the habits that limit women’s rise and how to shift them into habits that open the door to sustainable success, grounded confidence, and self-trust.
Ending the year with these final two makes so much sense:
We’re clearing the mental clutter, the loops, the over-awareness, and the noise.
We’re choosing presence and intentionality.
We’re letting go of what drains us so we can nourish what lifts us.
This is the work that sets the tone for a powerful 2026.
I’m honored to have walked through all 12 habits with you. They are as much for me as they are for you - we all need reminders on how to right-size our strengths. I hope this series continues to serve you as a resource, a mirror, and a reminder that growth is always possible, especially when we rise TOGETHER.
Cheers to your inevitable rise,
Sharon
PS - Here are the 12 Habits from How Women Rise by Sally Helgesen and Marshall Goldsmith with links to previous newsletters:
1 - Reluctance to Claim Your Achievements
2 - Expecting Others to Spontaneously Notice and Reward Your Contributions
3 - Overvaluing Expertise
4 - Building Rather than Leveraging Relationships
5 - Failing to Enlist Allies from Day One
6 - Putting Your Job Before Your Career
7 - The Perfection Trap
8 - The Disease to Please
9 - Minimizing
10 - Too Much
11 - Ruminating
12 - Letting Your Radar Distract You
Let's Close this Year...TOGETHER
You are not alone. The reason these habits resonate is because they are common and difficult to overcome on our own. I help women define what success means to them and achieve it with more joy and less stress. We figure out the habits that are helping you and ones holding you back so we can adjust accordingly. Imagine feeling fulfilled, happy, AND successful? It is totally possible, with the right support.
The first step is to schedule a free 30-minute strategy session to explore where you are and where you want to be. SCHEDULE HERE. It takes 30 seconds to schedule and will help you move forward. Don't delay! I'm offering discounts to those that schedule this call before the end of December (even if our scheduled call is in January).
Life is too short to stay stressed and stuck. Don't let another season slip by. I've helped so many people reclaim their life. I will help you too.
